Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Friday, March 23, 2007
Enjoy the commercial of one of the best toys of 60's and 70's. Followed by a review by members of the THAT BLUE YAK cafeteria crew:
I likes the natives. Wait a minute - that politically not right.
- Mike "Shapadoo" Washington (dishwasher)
The narrator's whisper makes me know that something exciting is happening here.
- Mary "Ferder" Shaw (cashier)
The way the mom pretended she was surprised touched my heart. Her kids deserved it though, makin' those shrunken heads and what not. Not like my no good brats!
- Milly "the net" Holensford (scooper)
I'm glad the narrator let me know that shrunken heads are good for "all occasions" because with the price of eggs and Easter upon us..well.......
- Big Ted (assistant to Milly "the net" Holensford)
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 10:08 AM
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Researchers at the Institute for Cutis Anserina - or goose bumps as they are more commonly known - would like to give a big fat "thank you" to Star Trek actor Leonard Nimoy. Scientists have struggled in the past to produce goosebumps on demand in patients until the discovery of the Leonard Nimoy music video Ballad of Bilbo Baggins.
Nerd scientist Dr. Michael Despario, speaking from the Rose Tree Corporate Park, discovered the potential of the video in February,
"As a trekkie, I've been aware of the video for years, but it wasn't until a woman I WAS dating turned on the video that I realized it's potential. From the look on her face from the other room I thought she was witnessing another 911 or something. When I ran into the room and saw that it was Spock doing his thing, I was very relieved. Within a few seconds of watching the video, her piloerection reflex was in overdrive."
Scientists are thrilled that the only potential side effect is vomiting.
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 10:30 AM
Saturday, March 17, 2007
It seems like the folk in Alabama have spotted a leprechaun. This may be a fake. Also, the guy at the end makes a claim that his magic Leprechaun flute was passed down "from 1000's of years ago from his great, great grandfather who was Irish." We're not the best at math over here at THAT BLUE YAK, but wouldn't that make his grandfather one of the oldest people ever to live? Anyway, Happy Saint Patty's Day and enjoy a Guinness.
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 11:25 AM
Friday, March 16, 2007
West Chester, PA
That Blue Yak would like to give a shout out to the blog Meandering Through Unforseen Pathways. "Meandering" correctly pointed out in her March 13th entry a spelling error on our award winning blog. Instead of using the letters "SIB" to refer to the movie theater trend, we used the letters "SID". Her eagle eye observations can be seen by clicking HERE .
That Blue Yak VP of Human Resources Ben Taylor is especially thankful,
"I am truelly pleased as punch. Our March 7th blog entry on the movie 300 was a very important entry. It was also the first time we gave junior copywriter Steve Janson a chance to edit the piece. He was asked to step up to the plate, and frankly, he failed miserably. He, as well as his family should hang their heads in shame."
Quickly becoming the most visited site on the web, THAT BLUE YAK felt a responsibility to take quick action.
"When my secretary Alice told me of the spelling error, I hit the roof. I knew it was Janson. I thought it was best to make an example of his incompetence at our company meeting. I called his name and asked him to come up and accept an award. When he got on the stage, I handed him a cardboard box and in Donald Trump style told him, 'You're Fired!' Then I had security escort him to his desk to collect his belonging."
"I just want to put this nightmare behind us. I play golf with Steve Jobs, Jeff Bezos and Jimmy Wales and it's kind of a running gag to raz each other when something of this magnitude surfaces. One time Bezos pulls put this piece of paper. It's an error from Wikipedia using the word boner instead of boulder. And let me tell you that Jobs STILL won't let Jimmy live it down. He can be a dick like that though. ANYWAYS, we're ready to move on."
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 1:15 PM
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
According to The Scotmans, Pope Benedict, who last week revealed to the world that he doesn't care much for Bob Dylan, said today he would like to see the comeback of Gregorian chants. Is the pope that out of touch that he thinks hypnotic 10th century chants (stupidest music next to jazz) are still relevant in the modern world?
That Blue Yak is pleased to have acquired a discarded note from 4th string Vatican Dishwasher Gianetta Hirshberg (name jewished up to preserve dishwasher seniority). The note lists several other comeback wishes of the pope. Will Pope Benedict perform his magic and make these wishes a reality? We shall have to wait. While waiting, please view the world premiere of the notorious scribblings of the pontiff:
Surprisingly, Pope Benedict issued a statement to THAT BLUE YAK:
".....my only regret to listing my wishes of Quisp, leg warmers and double dutch to my comeback list is that I left out my true love and wish: wax lips. Old school style.
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 8:53 PM
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
1 Empty house seat
6 rows towards center
1 Female dresser for Ms. Yarnell
l Wireless microphone
2 or 3 PZM mikes for Ms. Yarnell's tap number
2 People backstage for props
Professional lighting operator
Professional sound operator
2 Follow-spot operators
2 Stage monitors
Mixing board with reel-to-reel tape
Adequate house system with no broken speakers
An assortment of gels: amber, pink, green, purple, blue, red
Small helium tank to blow up balloons
16mm projector (sound not necessary)
Screen large enough for entire audience viewing
Projectionist (the film is 7 minutes long and opens show)
1 small compressor to blow up 3 very large beach balls
1 small breakfast table, table cloth, 2 chairs, large box of Cheerios, 1 quart of milk in carton, 2 clear plastic glasses, soup spoons
1 solid chair without arms (if top is metal, please pad)
1 package yellow food coloring
SHIELDS & YARNELL will need two dressing rooms, if possible.
A quick change area off stage right is also needed. Should have chair, long mirror, small table, and clothes hanger for costumes.
Both the main house and stage monitor systems should have a smooth, flat natural response, free from hums, buzzes or apparent idling noise.
1. One quality mixing console with equalizer
2. One 1/4" stereo reel-to-reel tape playback machine eg. Amper, Otari, Revox, Tascam with 10" Reel
3. Two side fill monitors - e.g. Altec A-7 or Altec 1204 - B
4. Adequate amplifiers for house and stage
When mixing the house system from the audience area, console should be placed in an advantageous listening position, clear of walls and balcony overhangings.
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 10:53 PM
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 1:07 AM
Monday, March 12, 2007
Editorial by Jack Renard
Consider yourself warned. The following video contains very disturbing footage of what appears to be a some type of search party under attack by a herd of monkeys. The people look like they may be from one of the unimportant countries but the point is - why isn't this stuff reported on the evening news or the google? Here it:
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
The phenomenon, although used by parents and children, is usually a tactic employed by males in the 15 - 37 age group.
"I don't want ANYONE thinking just because I came to the theater with a dude - that I'm a gay. I'm not. I'm TOTALLY STRAIGHT. Don't believe me ladies? Come on down and I'll prove it to you. That's what the 'seat in between' does.'"
Theater owner Bill Nikes of East Whiteland, PA has observed the evolution of the practice,
Each seat that is "left between" is in essence an empty seat. Ticket holder behavior, whether etiquette or driven by fear dictates that you don't sit in a 'seat in between'.
Theater owners have reason to be concerned. 300, based on Frank Miller's graphic novel about the Battle of Thermopylae could prove to be a doozie. The story details the battle of 300 Spartans in a last stand battle against the invading Persian army. The movie, with it's number of shirtless muscle men clad is leather-bikini and-cape ensembles could be the 'perfect storm' for the 'seat in between'. You put together the violence of the movie, the blatant homo eroticism and the 2 and 3 'seat in between' trend, and we could have 300 seat theaters declared "full' with 12 guys in it.
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 10:45 AM
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Editorial By Jack Renard
For all the people that think the media isn't manipulative, prepare yourselves. I'm sure it's never crossed your mind while watching your videotaped reruns of 60 Minutes that Koko the gorilla wasn't the smartest ape. When you see a gorilla doing sign language you think, "this has to be the smartest ape ever -he's doing sign language".
What you are about to see will make you question the "intelligence" of Koko. This video shows chimps not only talking, but performing a play. The play is about a movie called Star Wars . I found the video on the world wide web at the web address http://www.youtube.com/ . Why are talking chimps never mentioned in the main stream media? Is the "You Tube" a place where the media hides their secret gems? I do not know.
I now present to you, the video of talking chimps:
Monday, March 5, 2007
Saturday, March 3, 2007
Posted by Dr Zibbs at 11:29 AM
Friday, March 2, 2007
THAT BLUE YAK reporter Bill Spears
I have to admit that I don't speak Polish. I know nothing about the culture. I do like perogies though if they're deep fried and promptly salted.
I'll tell you what I do know - people. And I have an idea what this little rascal is about to do - PLAY HER HEART OUT.
I can tells by the eyes. I can tell by the poised fingers. I'm asking the reader to stop and look at her expression for a full five seconds....go ahead...I'll wait. Begin.
Welcome back. This is no parlor trick, but you felt it didn't you? Yes, she is about to play, and many a foot will be a tappin'. Many a Pollack folk will soon be up and dancing. A toothy elder with a shawl will probably get up and get her groove out. The elder will be old and feeble, but she will not miss a beat. A handsome man (by Eastern European standards) will play along and dance with the elder. The "handsome one" will be wearing a flannel shirt - circa 1986 - unbuttoned three down. A memory will be made.
The piano player, that I will name Olshka, will be responsible. To give proper credit, here is the link to the story that features this upcoming superstar: